Strategies
Pregnant woman on the train, should I get up and free my seat for her? The thing is, I wasn’t sure if she’s pregnant or not. It might be a very embarassing moment for both of us! Then the guy beside me just got up and left without saying a word or signalling that the seat is for her. He was actually standing up because his stop was here. But it is an interesting strategy nevertheless! It doesn’t offend her and allow the “pregnant” woman to make her choice. Fantastic!
Teaching tai ji requires a similar strategy. Instead of saying you are wrong, the teacher said, I prefer it if it’s done like this. I’m not planning to teach (not anytime soon anyway!) but it’s interesting to observe how a teacher teaches, to see what kind of strategy he goes about to make the student understand. It’s always the “win-win” strategy (like the above pregnant woman strategy) that always wins - do not strike at the ego, and yet allow the person to make his/her own choice.
Have you seen any examples of such strategies in your class (be it tai ji or otherwise) or in life? Please share it here!
This post has 5 comments
December 18th, 2006
Given the fact that you come from a Singapore, I expect such stupid thinking. Malaysians and many South East Asian thinks like you do - which is very shameful indeed.
Why think? Just get up and let her sit. If she’s not pregnant - so what? What so shameful about it?
People who live in Malaysia and Singapore are known to be very rude to their own races but will gladly do all out for a foreigners.
A pregnant lady will not get a seat on a crowded train if she’s a Chinese. Malay or Indian. But if she’s an American or other races with Anglo-Saxon looking skin, she’ll get a seat - no doubt about it.
You wouldn’t care less if she’s pregnant. What a joke! Shame on you!
December 18th, 2006
I think it’s you who’s having the “foreigner v local” goggles. Given that your blog is about love, compassion, peace (and all that crap that you preach), I don’t think you show very much of it but is the first to criticise others. I hope you have read the post properly and not just decide based on the size of her. Imagine asking someone “fat” and say please sit down. How do you think that’ll make her feel? Show some wisdom in your words, practice what you (try to) preach for once.
December 18th, 2006
First time reader here…..
Anyway, I would do the same as ShangLee… and no, I wouldnt give a seat up for foreigners anymore than locals. Makaw, you obviously arent one of the brighter people around, because your statements do not follow logically from ShangLee’s
December 18th, 2006
Makaw, I think you totally misunderstood Shang’s blog. This was not an article about not giving up our seat for a pregnant lady because we doubt her pregnancy. This was an article about TACT… A large-sized lady may look pregnant to an untrained eye, so if you had just offered a seat to her, wouldn’t it be insulting her??
Also, before you make comments about others’ character, please first take a look at your own. First, you made the comment about Singaporeans… you’re showing neither tolerance nor understanding, but prejudice and arrogance. Secondly, the blog mentioned nothing about foreigners vs locals. Why are you bringing it up here and making an uncalled-for attack on Shang??
I’d suggest you re-read the article and apologise to the blogger for your insensitive comments!!
December 19th, 2006
Makaw, I’m very interested as to where you are from, so that I may learn about your culture, which seems to be not stupid like the South East Asian people and very polite to their own races.
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