The Journey Within

Chinese New Year brings with it lots of yummy food. Due to commercialisation, you can actually get these food any time of the year, not just during the festive period, but there is just this little bit more temptation during the festive season to try out the food. As I hop from one house to another (it’s tradition to visit relatives and friends, especially those you haven’t met for ages!), I just “had to” sample the different food on offer at each place. I think I over ate…

Sore throat, fever, the usual suspects came to visit me instead. That I can deal with, since it’s quite common. What I haven’t tried is a whole day of hiccups. I’ve tried some home remedies such as rhythmic drinking, scare tactic, not breathing (!) etc, nothing helped. I end up trying silence, which worked for some brief periods. Better than nothing i guess, so it was a whole day of silence. A day of silence during festive season.

Silence to usher in the new Pig year. Maybe this is a sign. To listen to the music of life, rather than being just the source of noise.

Happy Chinese New Year!

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There’s a challenge over at Cook Ding’s to dedicate just over a month to train/learn something you’ve been wanting to. The challenge read as follows:

… from Ash Wednesday (tomorrow) until Easter (April 8), train every day, without fail, no excuses. It’s not as easy as it sounds. Some days, you might only be able to get a few minutes of training in; but the point is to do it everyday, no matter what.

I’ve been wanting to do this regardless of the challenge, but somehow there are always excuses. So i intend to list out my top excuses and hopefully, we can recognise these as excuses and don’t use them!

My top 10 excuses (in no particular order) for not training tai ji everyday are:

1. not enough sleep
2. too tired
3. too hungry
4. need to go out later
5. need to do a lot of washing
6. no time/place to shower after training
7. a lot in the mind
8. need to spend time with family/friends
9. work
10. errands to run

I have purposely left out “no time” because I can’t justify that as an excuse any longer. It hit me one day that there is always time, just have to decide how to spend it.

So what are your excuses? Please share and let us recognise them to remind ourselves that they are just excuses.

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Learning tai ji is hard work. I guess that’s true with learning anything! The more common excuse for procastination (to learn) is that “I’m not in the mood”. Taking tai ji as an example, it’s highly dependent on the internal state of mind on what you actually learn in a training session.

When i’m not in a good mood, the training session feels wasted because I rushed the training, not appreciating the lessons i can gather from each move. This will actually make me feel less wanting to train and the initial thought of training for at least 1 hour will be shortened to 30 minutes, or less as i leave in a huff… When I’m in a good mood, I feel that i’ve learnt so much that it’s difficult to contain the joy of that learning experience!

Good mood breeds good learning. Bad mood breeds bad learning.

So how do you make sure you do “good learning” all the time? I believe the key is to move from bad mood to good mood whenever you are learning. Even when you are NOT learning, moving from bad mood to good mood is always a good thing!

There are several methods people use to move from bad mood to good mood. Some people prefer breathing exercises, slowing the rhythm of the breath seems to help them. Some likes listening to music. I find doing the form itself a good method to ease you into a good mood. Of course, you can always try alcohol, cigarettes, drugs… One of my teachers actually proposed a bit of alcohol before doing the form! (drunken tai chi anyone?) I personally don’t do any of those but that’s a choice on my part.

As I peel through these methods, somehow, “having fun” seems to underlie all of them! It’s a useful gauge of your mood, and it’s also a useful method to employ so that you are learning. With all the complexities of learning, having fun seems to be a simple rule to remember while you are learning!

So the next time you are trying to learn, try to remember to have fun. That way, your learning experience will be enhanced and you’ll be having more fun.

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And i’m not even talking about spam. Spam you can delete. You know straightaway that it’s a spam. Even the anti-spam software knows that it’s a spam (most of the time). I’m talking about the email that you just have to read because it’s from someone who has something to say, but what he said doesn’t really add any value to the email discussion. In fact, it creates negative value!

It’s a definite time waster – not just for one person, but for all the people under the CC list. And then some of these people may ponder over why he said what he said, second guessing each word, phrase, commas etc – another example of time wasting. And then there might be some discussion among ourselves on why he said what he said. And then there might be those who will actually reply a non-email with another non-email, stating what has already been said but using different words. And this non-email will get circulated to the same bunch of people, people who had just about had it with the first wave of email fart, when the next wave comes gushing in. And as with all farts go, there’s no where to run.

So how do we deal with this?

We can’t just hold our breath – it’s normally too late by the time you realise you have to hold your breath, or in this case, stop reading. You can’t ignore it either, because you’ll have to read it in the first place to know that it’s an email fart.

The best way is to actually prevent the fart from ever happening. Otherwise, I would suggest the following “remedies”:

1. Stuck a cork into “it”

Ok, you can’t actually do that physically (well, you can, but i don’t think it’s legal – you’ll probably violate some “bodily harm” act), but you can always block this person’s email.

2. Shield it

You can always try to shield a fart. You can always rely on other people who has more time than yourself to deal with the email fart. By the time the email has gone through several rounds of people, the first wave of the fart should have dispersed, leaving you with a less potent email which you can just move straight to the recycle bin.

3. Shame them

Social pressure normally works, if you have the guts. Write a condescending email to the sender. Say on a Richter scale how much fart he has released into the virtual world. Say how much time you have wasted reading his email. And say how much you could have earned during that period. If he’s your boss, write a resignation letter as well. I doubt you’re going stay very long with the company.

4. If you can’t beat them, join them

Sometimes, you just have to join them, and fart along. See who’s fart is loudest or more potent. I suggest you have some fun at this point. Don’t take it too seriously.

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I was enjoying myself in a push hand exercise but my training partner was intent on uprooting me!

I asked: “Why push me all the way?”

He said: “In order to win in a push hand contest, I have to make at least one of your foot leave the ground to score a point.”

“But I’m not in contest with you?!”

“You have to be, because that’s how you will win!”

“I’m not trying to win! I’m trying to learn…”

“But every game has its rules of engagement. In push hands, that’s the rule of engagement, to win.”

At which point I realised that my rules of engagement were different to his!

It’s quite liberating to remind myself why I do push hands in the first place. I’m trying to learn sensitivity, I’m trying to learn to relax, and above all, I’m trying to enjoy myself. Those are my rules of engagement. Facing an opponent like him, I’ve actually learnt more because of his different rules of engagement.

It might be a good thing to clarify the rules of engagement before you actually engage a person. But that defies the Rule of Diversity. The Rule of Diversity dictates that you’ll have to train with different people, so that you will actually meet people with different rules of engagement!

That, brings us back to why we have to understand that different people will have different hands.

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I have recently embarked on the tallest journey i’ve ever been – on foot. More than 4100 meters above sea level, that’s how high Mount Kinabalu is. It’s not the highest mountain in the world, but if you ask my legs, they will definitely tell you otherwise.

The beginning was spent pondering over what to bring. And this was before the climb itself. I was weighing what is necessary so that I don’t have to carry more than what I need. However, of all the things I brought with me, the $3 walking stick I bought at the foot of the mountain became my most trusted companion. I even brought it home with me!

I think Mount Kinabalu is one of the very few mountains which you can just walk up without any specialist gear. As I was walking up the “stairs”, the feeling of being in nature was so refreshing. I can’t help but feel relaxed. We started off walking at 1800m above sea level. Sort of a cheat until you consider the next 2300m that you need to climb – I’m glad I started where I started!

We had a guide to take us through the whole trail – all 8 km of it. The first 6 km will bring us to a rest house. The last 2km will bring us to the summit. The first thing the guide told us was to respect the mountain. No shouting in the mountain. No plucking of flowers. The tag line by the Park Authorities is:

Take nothing but photographs, leave nothing but footprints

So, off we went at 8.15 am, armed with the wooden walking stick, an ID tag around the neck, and the neatly stuffed bag full of food, water, and clothings to face the elements. There’s even porters for hire if you think you can’t carry all that stuff all the way up!

There are a few huts along the trail to Laban Rata rest house – the end of the first 6 km of the climb. I rested in every single one of them! Of course, I even rested in between the huts, especially between the 4km and 6km stretch. The trail became steeper and more demanding. On top of the steep climb, the altitude might have caused the increased heart rate. After 4 and a half hours, I finally stepped on to Laban Rata.

My body just fell flat onto a rock. I lied down with the hands spread wide. At that moment, the mist was just floating by, re-energising the body. Together with the afternoon sun, the body rested itself peacefully on the rock. The guide motioned us to go into the rest house and do the necessary paper work so that we are checked into the hostel. First things first – FOOD!

The food was understandably expensive. The ingredients were carried up by porters daily. Our guide brought with him some instant noodles. He won’t be joining us until 2.30am the next morning, the time when we will proceed with the remaining climb to the summit.

I ordered a plate of Malay fried rice – $14. It was a big serving but I gobbled it down to the last rice. We were lucky enough to stay in a hostel with heating facilities, so after lunch, I went straight to a hot shower – ah… bliss….

The weather there was very kind to us that day. After hearing about the rain on previous days, i think we were really lucky that day to be met with full sunshine. As I’ve only got a pair of trousers, I took it out for some sun bathing so that it’s dry and ready to be used again the next morning. I sat out together with my trousers laid flat on a table. It must have been 2 hours later when I felt some pain on the skin and the scalp. Never would I have thought I could get sun burnt in the mountains. I covered myself up in a hood and finally went indoors when I’m starting to get headaches.

We were advised not to sleep so that we can go to bed around 7pm, to be able to wake up again at 2 in the morning. So, dinner was at 6pm. I didn’t have much and the headache was getting worse. I tried not to think about it and drank plenty of fluids. At around 7pm, I went to bed, hoping some sleep might make the headache go away.

I’m not sure if it was the sun or the altitude, but the headache got worse and sleep wasn’t nearing anytime soon. My head was really heating up and there were definitely feelings of nausea. At 9pm, I just got out of bed and took some paracetamol. And that did help the headache a bit. At least I got some sleep. At around midnight, I woke up again, feeling a bit better, but the nagging headache hasn’t subsided totally. It wasn’t too bad though. Just wished that the climb would start immediately!

After what seemed like ages, alarms started to ring. You can hear people’s footsteps outside the door. The main event was finally here. I fumbled around to get my toothbrush. After the morning routine, I got dressed and headed down to the meeting point.

At 2 in the morning, it was somewhat bright, thanks to the full moon shining down on us. I brought my torchlight along, but only had to use it occasionally. We followed a thick white rope laid down by park rangers. It was mostly rock surface in this last leg of the climb. Feels like walking on an alien planet. It was totally barren, apart from the eager tourists that dotted the rock’s surface!

Because of the hard surface, climbing up was quite taxing to the legs. There were some steep surfaces where you actually need to hold on to that thick white rope! After a while, it was a slow walk up a slope. We arrived at the summit at 5am. Too early for the sunrise. It was COLD….. The sunrise was 45 minutes away, so some of us cuddled together to get some warmth.

I took a quick photo shoot at the peak, and then began my descent. As the sun began to appear, we started to see the full majestic view of where we were. We were above the clouds. My descent came to a halt while I take in the full view of where I was. Although the temperature was low, the sun was there to give us sufficient heat while the eyes feasted on the beauty around us.

As I was writing this, my memory seemed to fade into those clouds. It’s quite unbelievable that I was actually standing there. The descent was made more amazing when I realised how many steps I have to walk down!

We stopped over at Laban Rata rest house again to check out, have a quick breakfast, before starting to descend the remaining 6 km. Some of the group “ran” down the mountain in 2 hours. I took about 4, almost the same time as I came up. I found going down more difficult than going up. When I finally reached the bottom, I held my walking stick in a victory pose, and headed out the gate.

On the whole, I thoroughly enjoyed the trip. Although I had “stairs phobia” after that – going down stairs was quite a “challenge”!

As some closing thoughts, I find I didn’t actually climb the mountain. I wasn’t thinking of reaching the top at the time of climbing, just taking the next step. I think the mountain somehow knew when you’ll hit your limits. If you try to conquer the mountain, you will fail. However, if you try to conquer yourself, you will definitely win. Just go when you can, stop when you must. Choose life, and live to fight another day.

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