The Journey Within

It’s not the best environment for doing Tai Ji when you have kids circling you in their roller blades or playing football around you. One of these kids actually approached me when I was doing Tai Chi in a public park. The kid said “you do this very well”. Not the opener I was expecting. I said “thanks”.

I went on with my practice, and the kid must have been waiting for me to finish. It took me around 20 minutes to finish my Tai Ji form, and then the kid approached me again almost immediately.

him: Can you teach me?

me: Have you don’t any of this before? do you know what I’m doing?

him: I’ve learnt Karate before.

me: Show me.

he then proceeded with a few “hee yah”, some parries, some blocks, some kicks etc.

I told him this is Tai Ji. It’s very soft. I let him push my hand a little, and I showed him how I use very little strength to make him fall. He was genuinely surprised. I was genuinely surprised by his surprise. I don’t know if he realises the significance of what i’ve just shown him. But hey, there’s no need for more words. I just reminded him that it’s soft. To do Tai Chi, you have to be soft.

Then I showed him “the beginning” (起式), and asked him to watch. He followed, a bit clumsily, but he followed, enthusiastically I might add. Then I asked him to watch again, and asked him if he noticed any difference between what I did and what he was doing. He said I sat lower. So I asked him to try. He did. Then I did it again, and ask him to observe any more differences. He watched. He struggled this time to say anything further. I then asked him to do it again, and corrected a bit. I motioned him to relax his fingers, his wrist, his shoulders. Then he realised what I was saying and tried to relax. Initially, he was doing it a bit like a break dance. After a while, he really tried to relax. I told him the hand cannot be limp. I don’t know how to explain intention. I told him not to use muscles, but to “think” that a force is in the hands, then it’ll be there. I’m not sure if he understood. He’s 9.

I’m 3 times his age, and I can’t claim I fully understand either. But he seems enthusiastic enough. Even came down for Round 2 after seeking his mum’s permission, although I’m not too sure what he told his mum… learning some martial art from some strange guy in a public park?

He seems to feel tired when I noticed his legs started wobbling. I told him not to sit too much to avoid hurting his knee. I told him if it’s painful, it means you’re doing something wrong. So I asked him to rest. Kick the leg about, walk around. We talked a bit, where he’s from, how old is he, when i’ll be around again…

All these started apparently when he noticed that I smile. He said his karate teacher doesn’t smile. I do. I wonder if there is something lost when people don’t smile. Do they not enjoy what they’re doing?

Do they feel the need to appear serious when doing something serious?

I don’t think I was wearing a silly grin. It’s probably closer to an inner smile. But if a karate kid can spot it, anyone can. Try wearing the smile. You are already doing something serious. That doesn’t mean you can’t smile.

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Love it when I see Tai Chi mentioned in a blog not about Tai Chi. It’s about slow, and how slow helps in learning Tai Ji (among other things). But I think people often sees a different reality about slow Tai Ji. They want to learn the SLOW-NESS of Tai Ji but they want to do it FAST.

There is actually fast Tai Ji. Just google it and I’m sure you’ll find a lot out there. I personally learn a Yang version of fast Tai Chi. However, it is not the speed of Tai Chi we’re talking about here. It’s the speed at which people wants to learn Tai Ji (or learn anything actually).

There are beginners who come to a Tai Ji class with the expectation of completing the course within 3 months and tell the rest of the world they know Tai Chi. Although I personally find this comical, I normally keep quiet about it and let them decide whether Tai Ji is really that easy to learn. When they see me doing it, some might ask how long I’ve been doing it. I would say I’ve been doing it for 10 years (or any 2 digit numbers actually), and they would be “whoa… it takes that long?”. I would then say that I haven’t even begin to scratch the surface.

I sometimes might put it to them nicely and say that I’ve been through a lot of mistakes and have met a lot of different teachers. Hopefully, you can bypass the beaten track that I have gone through. Hopefully, your learning experience is more straightforward.

Truthfully? It’s tough. Learning Tai Ji is tough. I sincerely hope that the people I come in contact with do not make the mistakes that I did, but when teaching, I realised something – it’s ok for them to make some of the mistakes, as long as they don’t make a habit of making those mistakes. There are so many things that can be corrected, but my approach is to say one, or at most 2 (see post on How to stand?).

The main point is to learn these mistakes, SLOWLY.

When we normally set out a goal to learn something, there is always an expectation to learn it within a certain period, and to gain a certain level of proficiency. In the case of Tai Chi, you probably set out your goal as learning all the steps, and be able to do it in (say) 3 months time.

What I would like to propose is to set a regular goal, rather than a fixed-and-be-done-with goal. If it’s something that you really want to learn e.g. piano, your slow goal should be “practise piano for 30 minutes a day” instead of “reach Grade 8 in 3 years time”. If you want to learn a new language, one of your slow goals should be “read Japanese newspapers everyday for 30 minutes” or “speak to a Japanese native speaker for 10 minutes a day”, and not “pass the Level 1 proficiency test in 3 months”. Say you like to learn chi running (a method of running in a low impact way), your slow goal would be “run with this method for 30 minutes everyday” instead of “be able to run a marathon in 3 hours” or “lose 10kg in 5 weeks”.

During these training sessions, put your full focus into doing and listening. You work hard, and you listen to how your body react to the work, and then you adjust accordingly. Setting such a slow goal will help you:

1. focus on doing it the right way

2. enjoy the activity and (sometimes) getting lost in the moment

3. do not injure yourself during your work, whether mentally or physically

I think all these points are very worthwhile when learning something, as oppose to becoming only a performer at the end of 3 months. Being a performer has its bad share of habits, but if you truly want to learn something, the only audience to your performance is yourself. The rest of us are only there to enjoy your moment.

So use slow goals. It’ll get you there faster than you think.

p/s: you may have noticed that I’ve used Tai Chi and Tai Ji interchangeably. Please read this for more information.

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For the first time ever since I quit my day job, I feel the cross roads. I know I’ve purposefully created this set of crossroads. Yet, when I realise I’m standing in the middle of it, I feel lost.

Now, the cross roads seem to have 2 main roads – be an employee in some firm or go into business. My third eye saw a third road. It hasn’t been surfaced with tarmac. It’s dusty, even cloudy. Doesn’t seem like anyone has been on that road before. And yet, my third eye sees it. And part of me is telling me to go down that road.

Seeing this road reappearing now starts to cast some shadows of doubt on myself. I don’t think I’m a confident person. I guess when faced with new untested things, there will always be doubts. Yet, this test here shows that I’m innately confident, overconfident in fact! I guess when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. In this case, the road will appear. Unfortunately, this road is not clear. I guess I am the one who’s not clear. Not clear where this road will take me. I seem afraid. Afraid of what? Afraid of failure? Afraid of throwing everything away? Throwing everything that I’ve spent so much time collecting? Accumulating?

A thought does come to mind now.

Forget about looking good and you’ll look good.

How about…

Forget about the third road, as ultimately, there’s only one road – your road.

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I’m now very intent on decluttering. My dumping activities continue. I’m now building inroads to allow an environment where less is really more. But less does not mean lazying around. Less does not mean being idle. It’s being more focused on doing the things that are more important to us. So I’m spending a longer time doing a few things. For example, I’m doing the longer version of Tai Chi as oppose to the shorter version.

Now, I know the title of this post may sound cheesy, but when discussing with a fellow Tai Ji buddy of mine, we ended up discussing why doing the longer version of the Tai Ji form is better than doing the shorter version. Here’s my interpretation:

1.  Tradition

I have to say, based on my efficiency bias, I like short forms. I think that the old Tai Ji choreography has too many repetitions. If possible, I would like to remove all the repetitions, and have a set which only has a unique set of actions. Unfortunately (or fortunately?), my current teacher is a traditionalist. He likes the old and original long form. So I’m currently “stuck” with the long form.

2.  Mental stamina

By doing the long form, it trains my concentration. It trains the ability to focus for long periods. It’s like the mental stamina required to run a marathon. Training such concentration is no trivial matter, as a lot of marathon runners would testify to. It’s probably the one thing that keeps them going, and the one tool that’ll help in your other daily activities.

3.  Threshold training

I believe the real learning starts after a few movements in the form. Just like running. You don’t start burning until after 20 minutes of the workout, that’s when the real burn starts. Similarly, you don’t start getting the benefits of Tai Ji until you train pass a certain period. So, the long form will make sure you get pass that threshold (read here for more on threshold training).

I remember when doing the 24 Yang style competition form, my teacher then would ask all of us to repeat the form at least twice, which results in a long form. My current teacher asks us to repeat the long form at least twice… this is more than 6 times the 24 Yang style short form!

4.  Compounding effect

Just like interest rates compounding, there is a compounding effect for training longer. To put it simply, doing it twice in a row is like doing it 3 times, doing it 3 times in a row is like doing it 6 times, and so on… (see 1 and 1 makes 3)

Longer is certainly the way to go, but only if you allow yourself to do it. It’s very tempting to just do the short form because of time commitments (see also my top 10 excuses for not training), which comes back to why focusing on less is more. Join me in my dumping project. You’ll have more time to enjoy the activities that you like most.

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I didn’t think I’m an overconfident person. In fact, I might have thought I am under-confident, until I took this test. I first read this from Ian Ayres’ Super Crunchers. So please humour yourself while you take this test. For each question, state the low point AND the high point. You cannot say “I have no idea”. You must be able to guess that the deepest point in the ocean is more than 2 inches and less than 100,000 miles (say).

1. What was Martin Luther King, Jr.’s age at death?
2. What is the length of the Nile River, in miles?
3. How many countries belong to OPEC?
4. How many books are there in the Old Testament?
5. What is the diameter of the moon, in miles?
6. What is the weight of an empty Boeing 747, in pounds?
7. In what year was Mozart born?
8. What is the gestation period of an Asian elephant, in days?
9. What is the air distance from London to Tokyo, in miles?
10. What is the deepest known point in the ocean, in feet?

Answers provided at the end of this post. Do play it. It’ll make the point I’m trying to make later more relevant. I was surprised at the result myself.

If all ten intervals include the correct answer, you’re under-confident. You can be 100% certain that Mozart was born between 200 B.C. and year 2000. But almost everyone who answers these questions has the opposite problem of overconfidence – they can’t help themselves from reporting ranges that are too small. People think they know more than they actually know. *

I have no problem with overconfident people. In fact, I would suggest some people to build more confidence in themselves! I’m more curious about the fact that this overconfidence is an unconscious decision.

As I’ve previously said, I didn’t think I’m an overconfident person, and yet, I got 5 wrong answers. Apparently, according to the book Super Crunchers (who quoted a test conducted by Ed Russo and Paul Schoemaker), most people missed 4 to 7 questions.

So what?

I think it highlighted an important observation in a lot of areas of our lives. Using my Tai Ji class as an example, people are often overconfident with their skills that they feel the need to teach it, whether it’s right or wrong. We can be so overconfident so much so that we try to brush aside other people’s ideas / opinions. Sometimes, it literally meant pushing aside the bodily force in a push hands contest, which firstly, is not a contest and secondly, is not push hands either.

I’ve been wondering why this is the case, only to find out that we’re all hard-wired to do this (as much as numbers can prove).

Can we rise above this overconfidence?

The book offered an example from someone who tried. He initially fell into it, but was soon quickly aware of what he’s doing and changed tack. I guess being aware is always a good first step, as with a lot of things. Just knowing that you’re overconfident can help you recognise the need to be humble to learn the things that are important to you.

Do try it in your learning experience. Share it here if you can.

Answers: (1) 39 years. (2) 4,187 miles. (3) 13 countries. (4) 39 books. (5) 2,160 miles. (6) 390,000 pounds. (7) 1756. (8) 645 days. (9) 5,959 miles. (10) 36,198 feet.

* This section is wholly quoted from the book Super Crunchers.

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I know the mantra. We should all work smart. I mean, who doesn’t want to work smart? Who doesn’t want to work shorter hours, be less stress, work more effectively, be more productive, etc. It sounds like it’s the only way to work! Working hard is just stupid. There should be just one type of work, and that is work smart. And yet, we all still work harder than ever… Continue reading »

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Never thought that the head can be important in the balance of the body. I’m not talking about what’s actually stored in the brain. I’m talking about the physical position and the weight of the head itself.

I was having my usual Tai Ji class this morning, and while doing a balancing act on one leg, my teacher suggested that I tilt my head a little. While I couldn’t get a good ground grip while standing on one leg and waving my hands from one side to the other, the mere tilt gave me enough balance to maintain the dynamic movement.

The main point of this tilt is a concept called “maintaining the core” (守中). The concept of maintaining the core is to maintain the balance, and the balance is achieved if there’s a core to fall back on. The obvious core in Tai Ji stances is the imaginary line lining up the top of your head to your centre of gravity. If this line is crooked, your balance will be affected.

It sounds obvious once it’s laid out like that, but when doing it, I never suspected that my head was tilting. I don’t think you can tell from afar. The adjustment I made was very slight, but sufficient to tilt the balance in my favour. I think my observation of small points making a big difference could well be true throughout the whole body.

My teacher eventually tied this up to how we lead our lives. As we move forward in our lives, maintaining our core is important, so that we maintain a balanced mind, and not be swayed sideways by distractions or dark alleys. My morning session turned into a philosophy in life.

p/s: A note to readers who are practising Tai Chi, a common habit for us is to look at our feet, to check for alignment. This is another example of head tilting and if possible, try not to do this right from the start. Feel with your internal senses rather than checking with your eyes. A mirror would be a better alternative. A video camera would do as well if you have one, and get someone to tape you, someone preferably who knows what you’re doing and where you’re going while you practise your form.

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I’ve finally processed everything in my inbox! Ahead of schedule I might add… Well, things will keep coming in, but I do hope the inbox will stay that way. I’m still left with action items, things I know I need to do e.g. reply an email, review an article, watch a video, download photos etc. But I already know exactly what to do with them, so they don’t clog up the mind too much. Still, these actions have been scheduled in. I’m aiming to do just 5 action items a day. It should be a small enough target to achieve.

Is my mind any clearer? Well… right now I can see what has been clogging up my mind. I’ve got too many personal projects running around. So, Project Dumping will include removing some of them as well, and leave those that are most important to me, or those which I derive most satisfaction.

Also, my google reader has got too many subscriptions. I spend my time scrolling through most of them, and skipping those who feed only summaries (no offense to those who feed summaries, just makes it a bit harder to read, especially on the phone). Project Dumping will be extended there as well. It’s important to feed the mind only the good stuff, so that the mind will churn out only the good stuff. Of course, sometimes, we have to go through fluff to understand what is the good stuff, like looking for a good teacher. I’ve spent 10 years learning Tai Chi to know that I was only doing Tai Chi aerobics… I guess I could spare some time reading fluff to make my mind filter reading materials more efficiently.

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