The Journey Within

Love it when I see Tai Chi mentioned in a blog not about Tai Chi. It’s about slow, and how slow helps in learning Tai Ji (among other things). But I think people often sees a different reality about slow Tai Ji. They want to learn the SLOW-NESS of Tai Ji but they want to do it FAST.

There is actually fast Tai Ji. Just google it and I’m sure you’ll find a lot out there. I personally learn a Yang version of fast Tai Chi. However, it is not the speed of Tai Chi we’re talking about here. It’s the speed at which people wants to learn Tai Ji (or learn anything actually).

There are beginners who come to a Tai Ji class with the expectation of completing the course within 3 months and tell the rest of the world they know Tai Chi. Although I personally find this comical, I normally keep quiet about it and let them decide whether Tai Ji is really that easy to learn. When they see me doing it, some might ask how long I’ve been doing it. I would say I’ve been doing it for 10 years (or any 2 digit numbers actually), and they would be “whoa… it takes that long?”. I would then say that I haven’t even begin to scratch the surface.

I sometimes might put it to them nicely and say that I’ve been through a lot of mistakes and have met a lot of different teachers. Hopefully, you can bypass the beaten track that I have gone through. Hopefully, your learning experience is more straightforward.

Truthfully? It’s tough. Learning Tai Ji is tough. I sincerely hope that the people I come in contact with do not make the mistakes that I did, but when teaching, I realised something – it’s ok for them to make some of the mistakes, as long as they don’t make a habit of making those mistakes. There are so many things that can be corrected, but my approach is to say one, or at most 2 (see post on How to stand?).

The main point is to learn these mistakes, SLOWLY.

When we normally set out a goal to learn something, there is always an expectation to learn it within a certain period, and to gain a certain level of proficiency. In the case of Tai Chi, you probably set out your goal as learning all the steps, and be able to do it in (say) 3 months time.

What I would like to propose is to set a regular goal, rather than a fixed-and-be-done-with goal. If it’s something that you really want to learn e.g. piano, your slow goal should be “practise piano for 30 minutes a day” instead of “reach Grade 8 in 3 years time”. If you want to learn a new language, one of your slow goals should be “read Japanese newspapers everyday for 30 minutes” or “speak to a Japanese native speaker for 10 minutes a day”, and not “pass the Level 1 proficiency test in 3 months”. Say you like to learn chi running (a method of running in a low impact way), your slow goal would be “run with this method for 30 minutes everyday” instead of “be able to run a marathon in 3 hours” or “lose 10kg in 5 weeks”.

During these training sessions, put your full focus into doing and listening. You work hard, and you listen to how your body react to the work, and then you adjust accordingly. Setting such a slow goal will help you:

1. focus on doing it the right way

2. enjoy the activity and (sometimes) getting lost in the moment

3. do not injure yourself during your work, whether mentally or physically

I think all these points are very worthwhile when learning something, as oppose to becoming only a performer at the end of 3 months. Being a performer has its bad share of habits, but if you truly want to learn something, the only audience to your performance is yourself. The rest of us are only there to enjoy your moment.

So use slow goals. It’ll get you there faster than you think.

p/s: you may have noticed that I’ve used Tai Chi and Tai Ji interchangeably. Please read this for more information.

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I’m now very intent on decluttering. My dumping activities continue. I’m now building inroads to allow an environment where less is really more. But less does not mean lazying around. Less does not mean being idle. It’s being more focused on doing the things that are more important to us. So I’m spending a longer time doing a few things. For example, I’m doing the longer version of Tai Chi as oppose to the shorter version.

Now, I know the title of this post may sound cheesy, but when discussing with a fellow Tai Ji buddy of mine, we ended up discussing why doing the longer version of the Tai Ji form is better than doing the shorter version. Here’s my interpretation:

1.  Tradition

I have to say, based on my efficiency bias, I like short forms. I think that the old Tai Ji choreography has too many repetitions. If possible, I would like to remove all the repetitions, and have a set which only has a unique set of actions. Unfortunately (or fortunately?), my current teacher is a traditionalist. He likes the old and original long form. So I’m currently “stuck” with the long form.

2.  Mental stamina

By doing the long form, it trains my concentration. It trains the ability to focus for long periods. It’s like the mental stamina required to run a marathon. Training such concentration is no trivial matter, as a lot of marathon runners would testify to. It’s probably the one thing that keeps them going, and the one tool that’ll help in your other daily activities.

3.  Threshold training

I believe the real learning starts after a few movements in the form. Just like running. You don’t start burning until after 20 minutes of the workout, that’s when the real burn starts. Similarly, you don’t start getting the benefits of Tai Ji until you train pass a certain period. So, the long form will make sure you get pass that threshold (read here for more on threshold training).

I remember when doing the 24 Yang style competition form, my teacher then would ask all of us to repeat the form at least twice, which results in a long form. My current teacher asks us to repeat the long form at least twice… this is more than 6 times the 24 Yang style short form!

4.  Compounding effect

Just like interest rates compounding, there is a compounding effect for training longer. To put it simply, doing it twice in a row is like doing it 3 times, doing it 3 times in a row is like doing it 6 times, and so on… (see 1 and 1 makes 3)

Longer is certainly the way to go, but only if you allow yourself to do it. It’s very tempting to just do the short form because of time commitments (see also my top 10 excuses for not training), which comes back to why focusing on less is more. Join me in my dumping project. You’ll have more time to enjoy the activities that you like most.

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I know the mantra. We should all work smart. I mean, who doesn’t want to work smart? Who doesn’t want to work shorter hours, be less stress, work more effectively, be more productive, etc. It sounds like it’s the only way to work! Working hard is just stupid. There should be just one type of work, and that is work smart. And yet, we all still work harder than ever… Continue reading »

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Never thought that the head can be important in the balance of the body. I’m not talking about what’s actually stored in the brain. I’m talking about the physical position and the weight of the head itself.

I was having my usual Tai Ji class this morning, and while doing a balancing act on one leg, my teacher suggested that I tilt my head a little. While I couldn’t get a good ground grip while standing on one leg and waving my hands from one side to the other, the mere tilt gave me enough balance to maintain the dynamic movement.

The main point of this tilt is a concept called “maintaining the core” (守中). The concept of maintaining the core is to maintain the balance, and the balance is achieved if there’s a core to fall back on. The obvious core in Tai Ji stances is the imaginary line lining up the top of your head to your centre of gravity. If this line is crooked, your balance will be affected.

It sounds obvious once it’s laid out like that, but when doing it, I never suspected that my head was tilting. I don’t think you can tell from afar. The adjustment I made was very slight, but sufficient to tilt the balance in my favour. I think my observation of small points making a big difference could well be true throughout the whole body.

My teacher eventually tied this up to how we lead our lives. As we move forward in our lives, maintaining our core is important, so that we maintain a balanced mind, and not be swayed sideways by distractions or dark alleys. My morning session turned into a philosophy in life.

p/s: A note to readers who are practising Tai Chi, a common habit for us is to look at our feet, to check for alignment. This is another example of head tilting and if possible, try not to do this right from the start. Feel with your internal senses rather than checking with your eyes. A mirror would be a better alternative. A video camera would do as well if you have one, and get someone to tape you, someone preferably who knows what you’re doing and where you’re going while you practise your form.

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How to stand?

We get asked this from beginners quite a lot. Often, they’ll stumble about, and try to mimic what we’re doing. And then some may ask. Others, we’ll have to volunteer the information.

The truth is, I don’t even know the proper / correct way to stand. I think the general idea is there. I used to think that the standard rules apply e.g. you should stand shoulder width apart when beginning. And for bow stances (that’s where one leg has more of the weight and is more crooked than the other leg), the feet will form a sort of ‘L’ shape with plenty of space in between the feet (as much space as your leg can take).

Nowadays, I don’t try to tell the standard rule, if it’s at all standard. I let the person decide. I have seen different people standing differently. I think the stand is meant to be different for different people depending on the body structure, the weight, the flexibility. I think we still need to train to our own specifications. So my question is normally,

how do you feel?

And if the student is feeling uncomfortable, i would say:

why don’t you try this?

“This” can be one of the following – relax the kua, relax the knees, relax the ankles, point your feet a little bit more inwards / outwards, shift your weight a little more to the left / right, keep your body straight, point your knees a little bit more inwards / outwards, keep your head straight, relax the neck, relax the shoulders etc etc etc…

I find this easier than handing out a standard prescription like “you must stand like me”. Suggesting minor corrections (1 or 2 would be more than sufficient) is easier to swallow for the student, because it’s still a suggestion. It’s better for the student, because he/she will need to think and feel around to see what works, and hence able to actually learn something rather than being spoon-fed.

How would you approach such a question?

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Some of you may have heard of the “fable” where Yang Lu Chan “stole” the Tai Ji secrets from the Chen family. I went to such a class which is supposedly “the class with the secrets”.

Nah. I don’t think my teacher is one of those that keeps secrets, either that or I wouldn’t know any better even if he does! But I think he’s trying hard to teach us as much as he can, or as much as we can absorb, so that his teachings are not lost. Let’s face it. Age will catch up with us whether we like it or not. It’s just that none of us could “get” his teachings yet. We can only try.

Seeing what he’s teaching in this class, I feel like I had the most instructions. It’s not because I’m better, or that the teacher favours me. It’s the private lessons I am getting. I don’t think I’m getting the most from these private lessons because I’m not “getting it” fast enough.

However, I don’t think I want to stop the private lessons either. Previously, I didn’t have a reference point. I don’t know how I’m doing compared to the others. I don’t know to what extent have I understood things. So much so that at times, I wanted to quit private lessons and go for group classes again, as I think I’m not getting the full benefit of these lessons (fault on my part rather than the teacher’s). It’s only when “performing” with the other students, I’m learning to see what my teacher has been correcting me, which is a lot. He gets into the mistakes before it becomes a habit of mine. Whether I internalise the correction is another matter… I need to work harder…

The main point is this – if time and money permits, do go for private lessons. However, don’t forget to go for group lessons either, as you ultimately have to interact with the world. Group lessons are there to keep you in check.

A bit about the “secret class”, we focused only on the “rise” – the universal starting point of all Tai Ji forms where the 2 arms rise up to greet the shoulders and slide back home where it all began. I did this for almost an hour. Imagine that!  The opening of the foot into shoulder width, the rising of the arms, the lengthening of the arms, the sliding back, the standing up, the closing of the left foot to meet the right foot… over and over again…

Then I practised Sun style with a fellow student. It was good to be practising with someone else again. The focus is not so much on my own self anymore. There’s diverted attention. Less pressure. Then 3 of us did the fast form. It was a fun night. I will go back again.

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Also known as soul searching. I first came across these words more than 10 years ago. I didn’t understand what soul searching mean. I still don’t understand what it means until I’m doing it myself now. I realise it’s the space that we need to think about love, work, life and all the actions in between.

Anyway, what I find helpful these days, is to jot down the things that tickle the inner me, things that excite me, things that I wouldn’t mind doing, no matter how trivial, things that I find funny, things that I find useful. So I came up with a (growing) list of things like:

• cute small paper bags
• snap on watches
• books
• Richard Feynman
• foldable bikes
• anthropology
• Charlie Munger

What’s on your list?

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Ever since I started the 20 minutes routine (see my 2009 new year resolution), most days consist of only doing the stipulated 20 minutes. It seems I have created an artificial ceiling on my training time. However, I have to keep reminding myself that this ceiling is only temporary, and it’s meant to be a floor so that I will always train beyond 20 minutes. If I can keep up a 20 minutes routine everyday, it’ll be quite an achievement for me on its own.

As of 31 January 2009

Streak: 12 days. Failure rate: 25.8%

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Ever since I made myself the promise to do Tai Chi everyday, I failed on the very first day – January the 1st 2009. Sigh… After that, I had a 10-days streak before I was ill. I’m on a 6-days streak as of 25 Jan 2009. All in all, my down time is 32% as of 25 Jan 2009. If I can maintain the 8 days I was lazy/ill throughout the year, the down time will be down to 0.02%. What an achievement that will be! That’s assuming i don’t fall ill I guess, or become lazy.

A few things to note when keeping a goal like this. It’s good to keep track of it, which is why I’m keeping a journal. I also find that timing myself helps. I’ve promised that my training will be at least 20 minutes, so I keep a 20 minute timer handy. Anything after the 20 minutes will be a bonus. I actually try to time myself doing the form as well so that I know how fast or slow I’m doing it that day. It’s quite a good gauge on the quality of the form itself.

Thanks to Rick’s comment in this post on spring cleaning, I’m also trying out some basics again, after concentrating on just the form for some time now.

I’ve recently modified the journal to include one more column, the action that I can try next time to improve.

So, in summary:

• keep a journal
• keep a timer
• do some basics
• jot down “next action”

I hope these tips can be helpful to your own training.

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My father was doing the “swimming” routine on land, i.e. waving his hands in a crawl (free style) fashion, while standing in a park. I noticed the wobbly knees as he swing from left to right and back again. I suggested that he should try to relax his hands and not wobble the knees as that might cause knee problems. I showed him how I would “swim” on land. He said:

It looks very easy, but somehow, it’s very difficult to follow!

I know my father (or I think i know him!). I know it’ll be very difficult for him to learn because it’s difficult for him to change his habit at this age. It’ll take a huge conscious effort to release even a little of the tension that has built up in the body. Notice I used “consciousness” to change the “body”. I believe the crux of the matter is this, it’s the mental block which is causing the physical block.

This observation has cropped up several times e.g. in “What does relax mean?” and “Drawing small circles“. It touches on the feedback between body and mind in both directions i.e. from mind to body and from body to mind. It ultimately focuses on being relaxed in both body and mind. I guess the question is:

Do you really want to relax? Is the goal of being relaxed really worth achieving?

I couldn’t find a strong answer to this. All I can base on is the belief that this is a worthwhile goal, which I do believe at a conscious and subconscious level. And then what? I don’t feel the need to justify “and then what?” as I didn’t think I will ever reach a stage of total relaxation. I might catch a glimpse of it, but beyond that, I don’t know.

But for a start, I think you just have to take it on faith that being relaxed is a worthwhile goal. If you’re in doubt, it’ll be hard for you to relax. I haven’t come across someone who doesn’t want to relax, only people who thinks they should be more relaxed, but after a while, forgot that they want to relax. I guess the mental chatter should go something like this:

Me: Do you want to relax?

My mind: Yes.

Me: Good. Now that you’ve made up your mind, DON’T FORGET that you chose to relax. Now try to relax.

p/s: While writing this post, I was actually forcing myself to finish the article before having breakfast, only to realise that i’m writing about being relaxed but not practising it. So i helped myself to a peanut butter sandwich. Ah… my tummy feels relaxed… my writing felt relaxed after that as well.

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